Sorry

I have been foolish. I caused many to worry. Do not die for what's wrong, but live for what's right. Still means I hate you guys......

Everything

Life is pointless. Or at least, my life. After all, what the fuck am I? Nobody. Heck. I don't even fit in the nobodies. Call me a wimp, whatever. Death is salvation.

Retarded as fuck, are some of the people around me. Its as if the only people in the world who has emotions was them. Anyone else capable of feeling sad, is stupid and useless. And when things go really badly for you? ITS MY FAULT? FUCK OFF. I specifically told you a way to solve your problems. You said you would do it. You did not fucking do it. You made yourself worse. And then what? The blame is mine again. Either you are amazingly stupid for not taking a solution presented to you, or my solution was wrong. That solution was everything to me, my morals, my life's experiences, EVERYTHING. And you ask why I seem so fucked up? Well, you've destroyed your son, and now your daughter is about to go down the same fucking path. You don't even know shit. Whatever I tell you all, you all say yes then do nothing. You guys never choose to believe you are wrong. So am I supposed to present my rotting corpse to you before you can slow down and think for yourselves? Do you all really fail that much as humans?

So many fucking hypocrites around. You obviously don't want to be with me. Yet you still do. Idk why you guys do this shit, feeding me with so much fucking false hope. Want to stay away from me, so be it. Being in another world, one where you don't belong, is bad enough. I know I am different. You guys fucking want me to believe I am the same as you all. Bullshit. Perhaps you all are just laughing behind me, how manipulable I am. Some huge conspiracy? Now somehow, I want to end myself, I can't, thanks to all of you hypocrites, somehow.

I put in my blood, sweat, tears, in short, everything. You gave me a promotion. You recognized me for my contribution? I don't think so. Everyone else got the rank. How am I supposed to feel that I earned it? So you are telling me, all that I have put in, is almost the same as nothing? You tell me, the hours I put into practice yielded the same standard as those dumb fucks? Then why the fuck, did I put in so much in the first place? So I could feel content inside? Bullshit. I fucking hate you.

Damn

I miss her